How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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