god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
