Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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