We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Randomize
