you traded sex for a burrito?
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
