She is in my trunk
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
Randomize