I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
