i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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