spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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