So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize
