dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
