Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize
