I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Randomize
