Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
