I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Randomize
