I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
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