I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Randomize