they need to just BURY HIM!
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
