Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
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