nut hugger
I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize