Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
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