I wanna passion pit in your ass
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
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