Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
Randomize