Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
That accounts for only three of the penises
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
