dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Randomize
