There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
