I wish I could teleport
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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