You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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