so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
