Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
