Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
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