i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Will exercising make me less horny?
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize