dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
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