No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Randomize
