Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
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