i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
