So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
ttyl tear gas
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
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