Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
