at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Randomize
