Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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Sorry DustinMcPotHead hasn't picked any favorites yet.

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(641): View more from Iowa

literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs

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(303): View more from Colorado

you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.

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(818): View more from California

I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.

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(920): View more from Wisconsin

dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?

(1-920): View more from Wisconsin

no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?

(920): View more from Wisconsin

he wasn't. neither were you.

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(970): View more from Colorado

Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.

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(858): View more from California

ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL

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(515): View more from Iowa

Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.

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(845): View more from New York

I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going

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(864): View more from South Carolina

He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly

(864): View more from South Carolina

Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does

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