We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Randomize