I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
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