I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Randomize
