there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Randomize
