we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize