I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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