i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
then he tried to convert me to islam
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
