I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
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