no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Randomize
