3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
Randomize
