I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
